I have a good friend. We have been friends since we were ten years old, and she recently stopped talking to me. My friend spent the summer and $25,000 on rehab, and now she is drinking again. I won’t go into the specifics of what happened or what I did…okay, I called her husband. I thought she was drinking again, and I called him to ask if she was. She lied to him about meeting me that day. She was supposed to be with me, and she lied, and I called, and he found out, and he was pissed.
Before her stint in rehab, I ignored her addiction. I knew about it, but I wanted to believe that she could handle it. When we were in high school, she was the classic binge drinker. She was the girl who would drink until she puked and then keep drinking and I ignored it. I ignored it when she sat next to me at a restaurant barely able to raise her head. I ignored it when she broke her shoulder after she fell down a hill because she was so drunk. I didn’t want to ignore it again. I’m an Empath for goodness sake. I could feel my friend’s pain, but I could not find my own strength to help her. I was not going to do that again, so I called her husband.
As soon as I told her, she started screaming at me. She screamed at me that I ruined her life. I could only tell her over and over again that I was worried about her. I only called him to find out what was going on.
“You’re judging me!” She yelled. “I’m not perfect. I make mistakes.” She has not returned any of my texts or calls. A person can only apologize so many times.
“You don’t know what it is like to be an addict,” my therapist friend said over a cup of coffee. She is right. As an Empath, I can see and feel so many things, but I don’t really understand the mind of an addict. I can only wait until my friend comes back. I hope my friend comes back.