Even though we signed the divorce papers months ago, I am still living with my ex. Because of our financial situation, neither one of us could go anywhere for a bit. So as our financial situation improves, so does my need to get my own place.
My ex got the house.
I am looking at an apartment today. The prospect of getting my own place to help create the physical separation is exciting, but the thought of moving out of this house is frightening. It will be the embodiment of all we agreed upon in the divorce settlement. My grandparents house, the house my mom and uncles grew up in, will now belong to my ex. I agreed to allowing him to keep all of our joint possessions in the house. I don’t want to take one item from our children’s home. In return, I will have a space away from my ex, which is greatly needed because as of right now there is very little that has changed.
I have looked at three apartments so far, and they just didn’t work. As much as I know I need to go, I refuse to settle. This is the first time in my life that I will not settle for something. I have always been in a big rush to go nowhere, always so willing to accept “this will do for now” instead of patiently looking and waiting for the right thing.
Today I will see what this new place has to offer, but it has to have one certain characteristic if it is going to be the right place. It needs to have a lot of light.