“Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any instance that they satisfy you.”Wayne Dyer
Based on how love feels, it is not as complicated as most people might think. Love feels like warm sunshine. Love feels full. Love feels like soft caresses.
In the midst of all of the many ways our minds try and convince us otherwise, love is an innate part of all of us. Even the hardest person, who lacks empathy and is a cruel manipulator, has love coursing through them. Love is usually just under the brick and mortar structure that people often erect around their hearts to feel safe and protected.
They do not lack the ability to love. They have lost sight of how to love. It feels vulnerable and hard to let down infrastructures that were built to keep harm out. When they created these structures, the person may not have realized that the same walls that kept pain out would not let light in.
How do we reach these people? You cannot convince them to change. There is no argument in the world that you can make with someone who is experiencing immense pain and who is opting out to opt back in. It is a decision they have to make for themselves. If you can create a loving space for them to see what real connection looks like and feels like, you may be able to pave the way for them to step out of their self-made confines. Unfortunately, you cannot and should never put yourself in harms way to do this. You must love and respect yourself first because you cannot love someone else fully unless you do this, and loving and respecting yourself first requires you to set boundaries for people who wish to harm you either physically or emotionally. Don’t despair. You are still free to love that person, but that does not mean that you must be accessible in all ways to that person. This is a difficult reality for many as they feel that being physically present with a person is the only way they can love them, but this is just not true.
Love is a deep vibration that is the only constant, so when people say that they have fallen out of love, they mean they have stopped feeling a romantic attachment to someone or they may no longer feel the deep pull of friendship, but love is who we are. You cannot fall away from that, and love has nowhere to go. You can push it down and build an encasement, but it is the only thing that is real, so it remains even when the ego is ready to move on.
In the end, the Beatles really had it right: “Love is all you need.”
Love and Light, my blessed friends. Love and Light.