Recent events have thrust strong women into the spotlight. Due to these event, I have recently had multiple conversations about the strength of women. One was with a man and one was with a woman, and in both conversations I found myself defending the fortitude of women. Both people had very valid points, and it really left me questioning: “How strong are women?”
Over dinner last night, my BF was talking about his athletes. He coaches male and female track. One of his male athletes was about to jump after one of his female athletes PR’d (beat her Personal Record). He laughed as he explained how he warned his male athlete that he was dangerously close to being topped. He stressed how important it was that his male athlete did his best. The male athlete agreed and they both understood this could not happen.
“Why did you do that?” I asked.
“What do you mean?” he responded.
“Why did you feel the need to stress to your male athlete he was about to lose to a girl? Who cares if the girl PR’d and may beat him?”
“Well, come on, Kelly. I didn’t mean it that way. Male jumpers should be jumping higher and better than female jumpers. Males are taller and have more upper body strength due to the greater number of muscle fibers. It’s not sexist. It’s science.”
“I am sure this is true, but you help shape the way your female and male athletes form their view of the world, and your actions support the idea that men should feel shame when they are beat by a girl.” After I put it this way, he seemed to understand, but his reasoning left me shaking.
Men are physically stronger than women. The physiology cannot be disputed, but does this mean that men are tougher than women?
“This is why women travel in packs,” my close female friend was saying the other day. “Women need each other, but there is a natural rivalry as we are forced to compete for the things we want. It’s primal,” she said.
“I understand we have certain primal instincts in place designed to help us feel safe, but isn’t it our job to acknowledge this and then make choices on how we behave?”
“Look,” she said, “even in nature the females are the weaker of the two genders, and the female relies on others to be safe. I’m not going to feel bad about knowing I am weaker when it is nature. It’s primal.”
And again I am met with science saying my gender is the weaker of the two, but I do not feel women are weak.
I see women giving birth and raising children. I see women carrying the responsibilities of a household, and women who shoulder tremendous grief and turn it into amazing opportunities. I am not saying men do not do these things, but is brute physical strength the main measure of strength?
I am willing to admit I am not built for strength, but I am not ready to give up on my gender. I think this society as well as others around the world have rained a belief system on women for far too long, and this has affected the way we approach physical strength. If society’s messages about the strength of women change, perhaps the way women view themselves will change as well. If these limiting narratives change, who knows what women will become.
Love and Light.
The Wandering Empath 
Ah, the age old question of who is stronger, women vs men. I myself rely upon the ability womenhave to grow new life and bear children. We are made to exist in a multidimensional way that I feel menjust aren’t created to do. Most men are one track thinkers while their female counterparts are juggling many balls at once at both home and in their careers. Perjaps this is a Westernized worldview and our culture here in the US has created a very competitive environment between men and women and the idea of success yet still doesn’t provide us equal financial competitive our efforts.
As a shaman, I reject the idea of competition all together and instead rely upon the necessity for balance of both female and male energies. For our world to live in harmony, this truth must exist in a muchmore stable way than we have now. That is ultimately what is playing out on the world stage. Our patriarchal society is crumbling because systems tried, and were successful in destroying females throughout much of history. Casting us as troublemakers and whores. People have been destroying Mother Earth, they have forgotten her and are deaf to her cries and needs. Part of my work is to remind others that we each embody both Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine. Healing ourselves, reckoning this truth and acceptance of ourselves in this way is what will heal humanity and Mother Earth. An end to separateness, competition, over reaching power, greed and over consumption.
Great question Kelly and one I have spent a lot of time pondering over the years. I believe we are equal and its the illusions from the ideologies I just mentioned are what keep us from seeing, believing and choosing to live as truth❤
Maybe emotional strength doesn’t count in men’s assessment of strength. Or, if you want physical strength, what about the strength to bear pain? Women will win that one hands down, I would have thought
I would think that as well. Pain tolerance is difficult to measure and it is not as respected. LOL. I think people appreciate when someone says this really hurts, but it may be more qualifying when men physically just pick up heavy stuff. It is a terrible measure, but apparently one which people hold in high esteem. Thanks for your comment!!