Everyday feels the same with the constant potential to be vastly different.
Hybrid, virtual, sudden lockdown, sudden dismissal due to bomb threat or fast moving snow storm. COVID sick, COVID cancelled…yes, the one in my fourth desk, third row, no, I’m not sure if it was more than 15 minutes. He couldn’t find the screen where the assignment was located…I stood by him to help.
Students in masks who I still don’t know, first names, last names and what they like to do on the weekends.
“Sometimes drowning looks like waving from the shore” was written somewhere by someone much smarter than me. This what I feel like as I hear people tell teachers to “shit or get off the pot.” The screams we are not teaching and we are not opening the schools and it feels crazy because I am teaching.
Everyday I stare at their lettered icons on a screen or try and talk to them through cloth across my mouth and clear plastic around faces that make them look like bee keepers without their beloved bees.
My words are muffled as I go through the motions and their eyes are glazed after five straight classes with only a ten minute snack break.
Breathing through the mask is hard but not as tough as digging through the books in my closets that I’m not able to put on shelves, looking for the right one for my student to read.
My co-teacher glares and passive-aggressively asks me why I “mistakenly” let a refugee student who barely speaks English use the computer marked “ TEACHER” in our room.
“Because it was easier,” I answer. And she’s angry at this response but she’s really just angry because we are 1B here and not 1A.
But none of this matters because we are the captains and are students are our crews and the ship is sinking slowly and we are all just waving as we pray we aren’t drowning.
But we are.
Good luck. Teaching is not for the faint in heart
Thanks so much! No, it is not.
I can’t image the hardship you and the students are struggling with. I have been teaching from home ( adjunct professor) since last year March and when the college opens again I won’t be going back. It’s either stay home and teach or retire. 🙏
Thank you for saying that! Yes, this is beyond difficult right now.
It sounds like you are doing the best you can. I respect and appreciate teachers so much. Be kind to yourself you are doing great I am sure. Bless you for teaching. Love ❤️🤗Joni
Thank you so much for saying that! 🧡🦋 Will try
I really mean it. I think the teachers are doing everything they can and I feel bad for the students too. Sounds like you care very deeply. My husband and I have always thought teachers should be one of the highest paid positions. 💕🤗❤️🥰
This is exactly what I’ve been feeling. This past marking period has been such a slog for the poor students and staff. We’re on spring break, but no one seemed excited about. We were hanging on by our fingernails as if Friday. Not sure how it will be when we go back for 10. More. Weeks. Of this.
We have 15 and I just don’t know how I am going to make it. Like you said about Spring Break (which we do not have this year) or any day off, it is more about crawling to the day and then trying to just rest before everything starts again. Every day is tough. Every hour is felt. Thanks for sharing your feelings as well. It feels good to know I am not alone.
Did you have a late start? Is that why you don’t have days off this year? You are so right that every day is tough. The only good thing I can take away from this right now is I really do know why I love teaching (because of all of the things missing this year). I think the worst for me at least is the not bring able to make those real connections with my students. Even my F2F students are not engaged and rarely speak to me or one another. Everything is disjointed. Hang in there. You’re so not alone!
Yes, and we lost some days in there as well. I think I still love teaching. I just hate this. Thanks so much for saying this! I am trying. You keep safe and hang in there as well.