This summer, I opted to teach for the ESY program. For those of you who are not in education, this means Extended School Year. I only have a handful of students, but they are students who do not like school, tend to do poorly in school, and have no interest in doing work even during the school year. Despite this, I am really enjoying it and really learning a lot.
Honestly, I am also doing it for the extra money so I can pay for my schooling in the fall. Doctoral degrees are not cheap.
But here is something beautiful that happened during ESY.
I am sitting in class listening to another teacher who is working with one of my students. She is reading The Five People You Meet in Heaven. It is a short, poignant book and her soft words almost whisper to her group as I work with another student in the class.
“Everything is connected,” she says. It happens so quickly, I almost miss it, but as soon as the words reach my ear, I feel the familiarity. So often I forget this sentiment. I get too caught up in the world around me. I lose sight of the strength of this three word clause, though I love it.
If I can just remember we are all connected, then I can stay in the space that nothing I do is truly random or ineffective. This being true if I act out of anything other than love, I can unconsciously damage another as opposed to lifting him up to his highest potential.
But what if I am not feeling very loving in that moment? Last night I was so angry with my teenage son, and I said things I did not mean to say.
Today I am tired and don’t feel much like teaching, but I am here and I don’t feel particularly loving.
In these moments, I try and remember my breath. I try and center myself back into feeling connected to the students or things around me. It feels more settled when I do this. I feel alive when I do this. I try not think or allow my thoughts to pull me away from this feeling of connectedness. I know it will happen, and it is that thought that pulls me out again.
So I take a deep breath and start anew.
Love and Light, All.