Poem of the Day: “Choices”

My oldest son and I have been talking a lot lately about choices and consequences and responsibility. He is angry with me about the divorce. It’s a mix really. He tells me he lost respect for me and his father because of the divorce. This came up because he lost his phone because of his…

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Parenting #101: The Conflict for Control

My teenage son and I have battled for control over his life since he was an infant. One Christmas when he was about four years old, I got the brilliant idea for us to make our Christmas cards. I carefully picked out various crafting materials and imagined the hours we would spend creating the perfect…

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Parenting #101: Teenage boys and their emotions

My son texted me from school yesterday. He was having a problem, and he was in the counseling office. Immediately, I panicked. “What’s wrong?” I texted back. He answered that his ex-girlfriend had finally moved on and had started a relationship with someone else, and he just felt really sad. He told me he went…

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Question of the Day: “How do I avoid raising boys who suffer from toxic masculinity?”

Toxic masculinity refers to the masculine “traits” that so often describe men. Masculinity has long taken pride in its high levels of physical strength, emotional detachment, and brute force. But these traits can quickly become dangerous when left unchecked. Brute force can easily turn into an unmitigated violence. Emotional detachment can spiral into an inability…

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“The Sins of the Father Are Laid Upon the Children” ~William Shakespeare

In Merchant of Venice Launcelot says this to Jessica. Jessica is the daughter of Shylock who is a Jewish money lender who loaned money to a Christian. When the Christian was unable to pay him back in a timely fashion, Shylock requested he be paid with a pound of the young man’s flesh. At the…

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Question of Day: “What do you say when your teen says he has trust issues?”

My son Cole is 14 years old and has been in his first “real” relationship for about six months now. Last night he turned to me and said that he is really having a tough time adjusting to a long term relationship. “What do you mean?” I asked. I was not sure what he was…

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Question of the Day: “What do you say to your child when he’s crushed because he doesn’t have a crush?”

My son Jonah has always been a bit different. If you’ve read my previous posts about him, you’ve learned about his anxiety and his struggles with autism. Despite all of this, he has always been able to make friends and be social. He struggles and often “tries” to act like others and “be normal”, but…

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Question of the Day: “What do you do when your version of the past is different than someone else’s version of the past?”

We were eating dinner last night. The conversation somehow turned to good meals we have had in our lives. Then my fourteen year old said the following: “Well, you didn’t start cooking until you started dating Brian.” I almost spit out my water. “What are you talking about?” I asked in surprise. “What?” He answered.…

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Parenting #101: How to keep from killing your teenager

My beautiful, vibrant, kind fourteen-year old son is currently sitting beside me. He is working on missing Spanish assignments to remedy his D- before the end of the 1st Marking Period, which is today. So, no, really. How do I keep from killing my teenage son? My son Cole has never been particularly jazzed about…

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Parenting #101: “The conversational dilemma and arguing with your child”

My two boys are extremely different. Cole is my arguer. If I say…well, just about anything, he will tell me I am wrong. He often asks “why” and try and talk his way out of every directive. It’s exhausting. When it comes to healthy conversations where we could find some connection, he completely shuts down…

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